Want Better From A Man Then Change Your Qualifiers
November 27, 2012 19 Comments
You can find a brother at the bus stop, boarding on borrowed money, with pants hanging off his ass, all grilled and tatted up, sneakers on his feet costing more than he’s earned in the past year, no education nor prospects for employment and he’ll believe that he’s worthy of somebody who’s bringing more to the table than he is.
WHY? Because, “THAT BROTHER” is looking for somebody who can “hold him down” because he can’t hold himself up; he’s looking for somebody with qualifications to take care of his ass. And he knows he’ll find her.
There are many problems with this and many women are at the root of them.
Point is: he’s got qualifiers, as does the educated man in a boardroom.
Now, ask a woman the same question and too often, what most of their lists will boil down to – because of the things she’s willing to overlook, forgive or excuse – is that if he’s breathing and will have her, that’s enough. How do I know? Because she accepts all kinds of disrespect and remain in relationships when she knows he’s only tolerating her.
Ladies, that’s NOT enough and it can’t continue to be OKAY; it’s time each one of us has self preserving qualifiers, and raise the bar. We don’t help unmotivated men by giving them all of our energies: attention, money, cars, body and having babies with them when they can’t even provide for themselves. No! We make bigger bitches out them; further enabling their trifling-ness!
You can’t ask them to man-up while you’re still “holding him (and all the obligations) down”; he CAN’T – he WON’T!
As you’ll continue to hear us (Alfred Edmond Jr and I) say in The Grown Zone: You don’t get what you deserve; you get what you accept. If you believe you deserve better then act like it!
Here we grow…Grown IS Sexy!™😉
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All the best,
Speaker, Individuality Advocate
Author of Living by Design and Living in Harmony