Who Says It’s Not Ladylike To Cuss?

“Fuck You!”

One of the most important self-preserving boundary establishing things I learned from my father is that, sometimes it’s necessary to meet people where they are. And some people will not understand you fully until you slap them with a few expletives!

I learned from Daddy that before I am anything, I am a wonderful human being amongst other human beings. Most are wonderful, but I will inevitably bump into some assholes and I need to be just as equipped to handle them as I am to handle the wonderful beings. In order to do that I have to have in my arsenal the tools that are effective against them, too!

You see, I’ve become good friends with some men because I had the balls to cuss them; to push them back – drawing hard fast lines – creating boundaries for how far they can go with me; earning their respect!

I’ve never had a man raise his hand to me (at least not my man – some lil’ bitch-ass I’d never have did once, but never a man of mine). An ex-husband did shove me once and then knowing that I was b-lining to my pistol (bought for me by my Daddy who also taught me to shoot it) he ran out of the house and stayed gone two days hoping I wasn’t still sitting in the “shoot” position. If I were too much of a lady to carry a pistol, I may have gotten my ass whipped that day, and then likely more days!

Being a lady is not about what words you use or don’t use – although most times it’s not necessary to cuss to get your point across, and some points aren’t worth cussing to make. It’s not about the clothes you wear or don’t wear. It’s not about the way you wear your hair, or the lack of hair you have. (High-five India Arie because, “I Am Not My Hair” hit the nail on the head.) Being a lady begins with respect for self and establishing boundaries – reinforcing those boundaries so that they are respected as you seek to live in harmony with others.

There are women who fuck anybody who asks, others who seek to fuck other people’s men – participating in PooNannie phoolery at its best; many are well covered in pink, adorned with ruffles and lace, in stilettos with all the finishing touches (mani/pedi) of a perceived lady and cuss words never part their lips.

There are others who quote bible scriptures as part of their regular conversation and speak death and destruction over those who oppose them, which to me is the epitome of cursing. However these same people will say it’s “ungodly” to cuss.

Don’t tell me that because I will tell you to go fuck yourself or to take a flying fuck at the moon or outright call you a motherfucker, when I deem it appropriate – meeting you where you are –  that I am not a lady. And if you do, then you can kiss my ass!


Here we grow…Grown IS Sexy! ;-)

If you enjoyed this, please share it with your Social Media friends.

All the best,
Speaker, Individuality Advocate
Author of Living by Design and Living in Harmony


About Zara Green
Hi, I'm Zara Green, A "Do Better" Fanatic and Your Advocate...I'm glad you're here! As a personal growth Author and Speaker, who's Individuality & Resilience-Focused, I spark conversations that expand thinking, encourage effective & productive responses and produce better individual decision-making and better interpersonal communications in relationships. Growing Up with Zara because life is meant to be enjoyed ;-)

6 Responses to Who Says It’s Not Ladylike To Cuss?

  1. polymathk says:

    Slow Clap…I fucking love it.

  2. Zara Green says:

    LOL!! Thank. You, Polymathk! I so enjoyed writing this! 🙂

  3. Zara relates to every woman – -every human! This blog is written about cussing/cursing but the message is MEET PEOPLE WHERE THEY ARE! I am committed to being me – free spirit, lover of life and people, truth seeker and knowledge sponge. I am also a mother and you have never seen steam come out of a human being until you have imposed on my children, my soul, or my money! With that being said I have encountered many women who will quickly insert cussing instead of seeking the words they need to know to communicate their message.

    Ms Zara thank you for communicating truths in a way that everyone can relate – -as “perfect” as we often perceive ourselves to be (or want to be) , I believe we miss the message. Its not in how you wear it, who you wear it with, or where you go when you wear it …..Its your ability to appreciate you have something to wear and wear it well while you design a journey that others will mentor, model, and learn from.

    Thank you for sharing our truths – good, bad, ugly…they are OURS!!!


    PS I want to send your daddy an XOXO too!!! Daddy’s make phenomenal women!


  5. Zara Green says:

    @AllisonSmiles – It is my intent to promote authenticity and fun for perfection is a far cry for all of us! Thank you so much for sharing here. Hugs ‘n love. xo

  6. Zara Green says:

    @Ms. Gee – 🙂 I’m in search of that “love” button! 🙂 Thank you so much, and for sharing it with your Social Media fam…I saw that! 🙂 xoxo

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: